Hands Clean
by Fluffisacoolword
Summary: James is still trying to get Lily's attention in his 6th year, but someone else distracts him. SLASH JxS. Rated M for sexual content.
1. On the Train

**Disclaimer****: Obviously, I do not own J. K. Rowling's stuff – her plot, characters, etc…it all belongs to her.**

Author's Note: Alrighty, so this is my first slashfic – be nice! Hopefully other chapters will be longer than this one. Umm, there is not much else to say, except please R&R! I hope you enjoy it!

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_This could get messy  
But you don't seem to mind  
Don't go telling everybody  
And overlook this supposed crime_

_We'll fast forward to a few years later  
And no one knows except the both of us  
And I have honored your request for silence  
And you've washed your hands clean of this_

"Hands Clean" – Alanis Morissette

I was jolted awake suddenly as the train went over a bump. I blinked, trying to clear my sleep-fogged vision. The room came in to focus, and I glanced quickly around. Across the compartment from me, Remus and Peter sat idly playing a card game. They must have been playing for a long time. Their eyes were glazed over and unfocused, and their hands moved the cards mechanically, not thinking about what they were doing. To my left, Sirius slept leaning on my shoulder. He snored lightly, his mouth hanging half-open. Because of the way we had been sleeping, I was trapped uncomfortably against the window, and I had a painful cramp in my neck. I shifted my shoulder slightly, trying to give myself a bit of room. Sirius snorted awake, straightening up.

"Oy, Prongs!" he complained. "You couldn't just let me sleep, could you?" I laughed.

"Of course not, Padfoot," I replied. "You were drooling on my arm." I looked pointedly down at the arm in question. It was, indeed, wet with his dribble. I brushed my shoulder against his arm, trying to wipe it off on him. Sirius yelped, leaning away from me to avoid it. I leaned closer, and he shoved me off of him. I shoved back, and we soon fell to the floor, wrestling.

Remus and Peter continued to play cards, ignoring us. This behavior was normal for us. Sirius finally pinned me, grinning over my face as I struggled to get up.

"Damn it," I muttered, resigning. Sirius stood up, brushing himself off before reaching out a hand to help me up. I took his hand and stood up. At least it was only my dignity that was bruised.

"Remus! I've been looking all over for you!" the female voice from behind startled me. "Have you patrolled the train yet?" Lily Evans asked Remus, her green eyes sparkling. She glanced over at Sirius and me standing side by side and rolled her eyes at us before looking back to Remus.

"We've got about 20 minutes before we actually arrive…I've been telling most of the first years to get changed into their robes but I assumed the older students," she stopped and looked Sirius and me up and down – we were both still in our regular clothing, "would know better," she finished, turning back to Remus. Remus nodded.

"Yes. I patrolled about 10 minutes ago. Everything's good" He said swapping one of his own cards for one of Peter's. Lily smiled at him

"Oh, good. How was your summer, Peter?" She said acknowledging the unremarkable boy. He nodded, but was so absorbed in the card game that he didn't seem to realize she had asked him a question. She gave Sirius and me another disapproving look before she said, "I'll see you at the feast then," and traipsed out of the compartment.

As usual, I was left a little stunned by her voice, and I stared after her.

"Snap out of it, mate," Sirius said, waving a hand in front of my face. I turned unwillingly away from her retreating form and went to change.


	2. Are you gay?

**Disclaimer****: Obviously, I do not own J. K. Rowling's stuff – her plot, characters, etc…it all belongs to her.**

Author's Note: Aiee, another short chapter! My apologies. Hopefully the next ones will be a bit longer. Anyway, I hope you like it! Please review. I am open to constructive criticism :)

Coming into the common room after the feast, Sirius, Remus, Peter, and I all plopped down onto two couches facing each other. We were sitting the same way as we had been on the train, with Black on the same couch as me and Lupin and Pettigrew together. I watched Lily wistfully as she climbed the stairs to the girls' dormitories.

"You'll get her this year." Sirius promised, putting his arm around my shoulders and grinning at me. He thought my obsession with Lily was hilarious; he couldn't understand why I was so intent on sticking to one girl. He had dated more girls at Hogwarts than either of us could keep track of, and broke his record last year by hooking up with over 30 different girls before final exams.

Just then a group of second year girls walked by, and one of them faltered, doing a double-take toward me and Sirius. I raised one eyebrow, confused as to what they had noticed. It didn't dawn on me until the girl spoke, what our position looked like as Sirius leaned with his arm around me, grinning stupidly in my face.

"Are you guys…" the girl began, her eyes darting back and forth between us, "um, you know…_gay_?" She whispered the last word. All of her friends stopped with her to stare at us, holding their breath as they waited for our answer. I stifled a laugh, and behind the girls, Remus and Peter sat with their mouths covered, laughter dancing in their eyes. Sirius was definitely going to have fun with this one.

"Why, indeed we are," Sirius answered matter-of-factly, pulling me closer to him. I squirmed a little, uncomfortable at the close contact. Then, shocking me as well as the girls, he wound his arm all the way around my neck, planting a kiss on my lips. I felt an electric shock move between us, and the kiss lingered for a couple seconds. Remembering our audience, I shot back, pulling away from him.

"What the hell?!" I cried, doing my best to sound disgusted. "You _kissed_ me!" I wiped at my lips with my hand, as though trying to get the cooties off. But, for some reason, I was not repulsed. I was, conversely, intrigued by this odd feeling it had brought up in me.

"You know you liked it," Sirius said with a crooked grin. I rolled my eyes, shoving his arm off of my shoulders.

"You really are a stupid git," I told him. "I hope you know that."

The second-years gave us an odd look and scurried off, probably to find someone a little more normal to talk to. The four of us looked at each other, and we couldn't contain it anymore. We all burst out laughing.


	3. Truth or Dare

**Disclaimer****: Obviously, I do not own J. K. Rowling's stuff – her plot, characters, etc…it all belongs to her.**

Author's Note: Finally, a chapter that's a little bit longer! It's going to start getting more intense between these two…I hope you enjoy it!

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I tossed and turned in my four-poster bed, desperately trying to find sleep that refused to come. I hadn't looked at a clock in a while, but I knew it was past two in the morning. My brain wouldn't stop whirring with thoughts that kept me wide awake. For the most part, I was thinking about Sirius, even though it had been weeks since our incidental kiss. People had long-since quit teasing us about it, but my own mind couldn't seem to drop the topic.

I wasn't _gay_. I liked girls. No, that's an understatement. I _loved_ girls. And I knew what I felt for Lily, and there was no way that feeling could be anything but love. But what was that spark I felt when Sirius' lips touched mine? I groaned, squeezing my eyes shut. I shouldn't be thinking about this! But, no matter how hard I tried to keep the image out of my brain, it kept coming back to haunt me.

I suppose I had never really considered whether I liked guys before. I had just assumed I didn't. That was the logical way to look at it, wasn't it? I tried to remember times I had seen guys in TV or movies and felt attracted. I couldn't think of anything, but that wasn't really proof – I couldn't think of any girls in shows that had really aroused me either. But, why was I testing myself in the first place? _I wasn't gay_. A tiny voice in the back of my head argued back that I didn't really know that. I quickly told the voice to shut up, then briefly wondered if I was truly going mad.

Not that Sirius was helping me with my confusion. He kept joking and puckering his lips at me, then looking hurt when I wouldn't kiss him. Mostly, I just wanted to slap him across the face when he did that. But another part of me wondered how serious he was about it.

Merlin's beard, it was boiling in the dorms. I threw back my blanket, pulling my shirt over my head and throwing it on the floor. It joined the gigantic mess that now surrounded my bunk, though we were barely a month into school. Falling back against the bed, my thoughts returned immediately to Sirius.

"Psst," I heard a familiar hiss, interrupting my thoughts. "Prongs! You up?" I pulled back the curtains around my bed to see Sirius lying on his bed, in a position that mirrored mine to a tee. He was even shirtless, too. He smirked as he noticed our identical positions.

"Yeah," I answered, "what is it?"

"Nothing," he sighed. "Just can't sleep, that's all."

"Me neither." No need to tell him _why_ I was having such a hard time falling asleep. He sat upright, motioning for me to come over to his bunk. I stood up, the cold floor temporarily relieving my feet of the stuffy heat of the dormitories. I crossed between our beds quickly, however, sitting down opposite him on his bed.

"How about some Truth or Dare?" he whispered, grinning.

I rolled my eyes. "What are we, 12-year-old girls?"

"Have any better ideas?" He looked at me expectantly.

"Yeah, how about _anything_ else?" I did my best to give him an icy glare, but he just laughed.

"Nope. We're playing, whether you like it or not."

I sighed, giving up. Maybe I could use this to my advantage.

"Fine," I muttered. "But Truth or Dare with two people always turns into Truth or More Truth. This is going to be boring." He shook his head, pulling a sickle out of his pocket.

"Heads is truth," he told me, turning it over in his fingers. "Tails is dare." He handed me the coin, indicating that I should start.

I sighed, taking it from his hands and flipping it up into the air. I caught it, slapping it onto the back of my hand. The noise echoed through the dorm room, and we both froze, listening for our roommates to wake up. They didn't, and I let out my breath as I lifted my hand to uncover the coin. Heads.

"Truth…" he said to himself, thinking. "What's the farthest you've gotten with a girl?" Bloody hell. This was off to a great start. I looked down at the sheets, feeling the heat creep into my cheeks.

"I, er…" Why was I playing this game, again? "I guess you would call it second base."

"What do you mean, 'you guess'?" Crap.

"Well, you know…" I looked at the wall. "It, er, involved my hands. And her, uh…It's your turn, damnit!" I threw the sickle at him, as hard as I could. Unfortunately, he caught it just in front of his face, and it didn't leave the mark I had been hoping for. He snickered, then tossed the coin into the air, catching it fluidly and slapping it onto the back of his hand. Heads.

"If you could snog any 6th year, who would it be?" I asked him. His eyes filled with excitement.

"Ohhh, well I'd love to have a go with that Melinda girl. But then again there's always Catherine. Or Mary. Or Lucinda, or Elizabeth, or…" he continued, and I tried to block out my secret hope of hearing my own name. This was stupid. I didn't even know what I wanted.

"Alright, alright," I interrupted his long list of names. "It's my turn." I snatched the sickle from him, quickly tossing it up and catching it again. Tails.

"I dare you…" he smiled wickedly at me. _Note to self: never play Truth or Dare with Sirius ever again. _"to kiss me." Oh God.

"What?"

"You heard me." His grin widened. "Kiss me. On the lips. Full-on."

I responded with a shocked, pale face.

"What? You don't have the balls to do it? I guess I should have known. You're not secure enough in your –"

I silenced him with my lips on his. So close to his warm body, in the cold air of the dormitories, I was suddenly hyperaware of the fact that neither of us had a shirt on. Without meaning to, I parted my lips slightly, pressing my lips even harder against his. I was suddenly very dizzy, and I pulled back away from him. He grinned, while I smiled sheepishly and handed him the coin back.

The game continued on, and every dare thereafter became a kiss. The person who had landed tails would have to do the exact type of kiss that the other asked. The truth questions got more and more personal, asking each other about masturbation or dreams about sex. There was some sort of high that came with it being past four in the morning that made me willing to ask and answer all of these questions – or perhaps it was because of that strange spinning feeling I would have each time we kissed.

Either way, we kept playing until much later than we had intended. We kissed, laughed, shoved, and wrestled until we were finally awoken by the sounds of Remus and Peter waking up to go down to breakfast. But I definitely didn't regret missing that night of sleep.


End file.
